Good evening solar system, I've had four hours of sleep since the last time I talked to you (a situation which will be addressed as soon as I'm done writing this, I assure you)
So, I have a Pokemon fan fiction all planned out and I really like so many of the ideas that I have for it, but the problem is that I am the kind of person who wants every single thing I write to be absolutely amazing and impressive, and I find that it's just really hard to write a fan fiction and have it be well written.
One of the problems I ran into early on is that, since it is a fan fiction most of the people who read it will probably be fans of the franchise. Therefore, if you introduce all the characters and the premise of the storyline and whatever, they will probably find it boring and be like WHY IS THERE HALF A PAGE OF BACKSTORY WE ALL KNOW THIS ALREADY. But the other problem is that, just as a writer, I find it really awkward to just plow into a story and not introduce things.
Anyhow. Hopefully tomorrow, once I have had a bit more sleep, I will be able to get a good start at it before I lose all the excitement I've been building up.
As for my post yesterday, I just wanted to say that what I said about being willing to listen to anyone if they need it was true. I have not reread my post because I am kind of afraid of reading what my rambling sounded like, so I'm sorry if I sounded a bit crazy but I am not sorry if I sounded a bit emotional. This is a serious subject and this is an emotional subject. These are real people losing their lives, and real futures being stolen away forever. These are real families and real friends and real worlds being shattered into little pieces because of a few horrible, heartless people.
I hate seeing people in pain. I want to just go around and sit down with every lost and hurt person and help them sort out every single thing that's wrong in their life. That's just how I am. Maybe some of the horrible, heartless people only act that way because of things that are wrong in their lives, and maybe they need someone to talk to. But that is one group of people I don't think I could possibly console. I am way too forgiving at times, but I will not forgive pushing someone to end their life, ever. If you feel bad about it and you need some sort of counseling then by all means go and find that.
I do think you'd have to be pretty oblivious to not see that someone can be seriously hurt by the things you say, and a pretty big jackass to participate in that harassment in the first place. If you do not take it seriously, if you do not care about the effects it has on the victim, if you feel no remorse, if you feel no pity or sympathy or compassion, then I feel nothing for you. You need to crawl back into whatever cold and barren hellhole you got spat out of because this world has NO use for someone like you.
Now I am getting angry and I do not want to get angry. I'm not trying to trash anyone who has ever made fun of ANYONE in their lifetime, because we all have. All of us. As much as I want to believe that anyone who bullies someone else to the point of suicide is a complete monster and that there is something disturbed and sinister deep within them that doesn't care if someone gets pushed over the edge, that is not completely true. Some people don't think that the things they say will cause that much pain. They always say things like "I never meant for it to go that far"
Well here's an idea. If you don't want it to go that far DON'T BE SUCH A FUCKING PRICK IN THE FIRST PLACE.
*ahem*
The thoughtful, level-headed person deep down in me (at this exact point in time they are VERY deep down) reminds me that it must be such a terrible weight to have hanging over you for the rest of your life, knowing that you pushed someone to the point of suicide. Knowing that the things YOU said caused that suffering,that torment, that shattering of a human's heart, mind, and soul to the point where they could not bear to face it anymore. And I would hate my lack of sympathy towards someone in that situation to break THEIR spirit, to cause them to suffer in anguish like the person before them. Because I believe there are very very few people in the world who earnestly deserve to die. But I just have such a hard time sympathizing with them.
I have been on the receiving end of so much harassment and so much teasing and there have been days where I wouldn't have thought twice about walking out in front of a moving car. But I am still here today, and I do not want to see anyone else have to go through what these people in the past three weeks, and all those before them, have gone through. Something needs to be done about it and the only time to do it is now. It is never too early to start saving a life but it can end up being too late at any moment.
You'll see me tomorrow.
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